Week 1 - done!

  Well, I survived my first week of interning!! Let me apologize in advance because I know that this update will just be a general overview of my first week. I'm still quite overwhelmed, but hopefully soon I will have a better grasp on things and can share more about the specifics of this internship. I can tell that this position is going to be super stretching for me. It's so odd to be in a position of authority over so many people! Every day I've been praying for confidence, while still staying humble. Humble confidence is DEFINITELY something that I'm going to have to develop. It's so easy to second-guess yourself and to remain silent in situations where you ought to speak up when you don't really know what you're doing. It's definitely intimidating, but I know that God is with me every day and will give me all that I need to do the work He has called me to do. He is so faithful and will never give me more than I can handle. At least I have confidence in that!

  Amidst the stress and uneasiness of starting a new job, there have also been some really fun times this week. Every Friday night is GNO (Girl's Night Out) and Friday is one of my on-shift days! I am so excited about this...having an opportunity to interact with the residents outside of the Vision of Hope home and its strict schedule. This past Friday we went to the creek where some of the ladies went swimming in the water. We made paper boats and raced them down the creek, chasing them from the shore as they went. We all had a great time.

  Right now there are 8 ladies in Phase 1, which is the phase I have the most interaction with. One of the ladies is about to move to Phase 2, and we are all very excited! We have welcomed two new residents since I have been here, and I believe we are welcoming another new lady this Wednesday! Getting the rooms filled is very exciting, and to be totally honest it's been really nice to have a couple of girls here who don't know more than we new interns do! I can tell that many of the residents who have been here for a while are having a hard time with so many new interns here. It must be hard to have to be so vulnerable and trusting with someone you just met. This can be discouraging to us new interns at times, but I know that this will pass once we get to know the ladies better.

    There are so many things that I'm learning already, and it's only been a week! So many areas of weakness are being revealed in my life, and I'm excited to strengthen them. Right now I'm learning to be okay with the fact that not everyone is going to like you. This seems like a "duh" moment, but being accepted by people is something that I've always longed for way too much! But here I am in a leadership position and I am new and some of the residents here are not going to like me at all...and I have to be okay with that! I have to remember that I am here to be their authority, not necessarily their friend. I am to love them with the love of Christ and by doing as my authorities instruct me. I do realize that the "not everyone will like you" lesson is something everyone knows and are told throughout their lives, but you never really learn to be okay with that until you're put in a position where you really aren't accepted by all. Oh well, life goes on, and I'm learning!

  Thank you all SO much for your prayers!! I seriously couldn't do this without prayer support. Please pray for humble confidence and wisdom to know how to handle every situation I may face. And please pray that I will be constantly aware of God's presence in my life, as I believe this will help me in the whole "humble confidence" thing.


"For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ." -Galatians 1:10

So it begins - training week!

 

  Well, here I am! My parents and I made it safely to Lafayette, Indiana! We arrived Saturday afternoon and all stayed overnight in a hotel. We were able to attend Faith Church on Sunday morning together, which I am very thankful for since that is the church I will be attending this year. The service was great! I really appreciate Pastor Viars as he preaches the Word with boldness, unapologetically. He reminds me of my wonderful Pastor back home!

  After the service I said my goodbyes to my parents and caught up with one of the current Vision of Hope interns. We had lunch with a fellow "newbie" intern, Helen, and then were taken to the house that we will both be staying at for these first two weeks. The family that Helen and I are staying with have been so amazing and encouraging. They constantly open their home to those who need it, and are also very active in Faith Church and Vision of Hope. This is truly a house of hospitality.

  Monday began our first day of training. There are seven new interns including myself. So far we have been covering the application process that the residents have to go through to enter into the program, how the medicine closet works, the household cleaning and cooking, and lots and lots of policies! I have been very encouraged by the openness of the staff here, and how they have made it clear that they are never too busy for our questions. They understand that as new interns we will be making a lot of mistakes, and that's okay! Mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow, and they will lovingly correct us and direct us in how to handle the situation properly next time.

  After training each day, I have had the opportunity to spend a lot of time with the other interns, those who are new like me and those who have been here a while. We've watched movies and floated in the river and...has anyone ever heard of slacklining? I never had, but one of the interns, Nickey, introduced us to it on Tuesday. Basically, slacklinging is where you stand on a cord that is suspended between two fixed objects,  (trees, polls, etc.) and attempt to balance, walk, do tricks...whatever you can do. We are all at the "walk as best you can and try not to hurt yourself" stage, but who knows? Maybe at the end of this year we'll all be pros, traveling around the world to do competitions and become famous and...

Yeah, right.

This is me slacklining:

And these are the pros:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KTZlSwgoS4

Nope, I don't think we'll get QUITE that good.

  I'm already learning so much. The main thing that I have learned so far is that loving someone doesn't always mean making their life easier or taking them out of situations that are hard and that hurt them. Many of the residents here have been through horrific, traumatic situations, and often struggle with flashbacks and panic attacks. These are so difficult for them, but this is something that they must work through in order to heal, and so in order for me to love them I must allow them to go through this hurt. Doing what makes others feel better isn't always the most loving thing that I can do. I think that will be a challenge for me...seeing the girls struggle and hurt, and knowing that this must happen in order for them to heal. I know that I will learn so much this year about showing the true love of Christ...and of course a ton of other stuff as well!!

  Tomorrow is the last day of training and on Sunday we start job shadowing the current interns. We will job shadow until next Saturday, then the real deal starts on Monday! Please be praying for wisdom and understanding of the love of Christ and how to reflect that to others.

  Thank you all SO MUCH for all of your prayers!! There is no way that I could do this without the prayer and support of all of you.

Love in Christ!

"being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."
-Philippians 1:6

(All of the newbies. Back row L-R: Sarah, Hannah, Helen, Me, Karen. Front row L-R: Janessa, Susan.)

Here We Go...

  The title of this post seems a bit apprehensive, doesn't it? That's because that is exactly where I am at right now. God has brought me to a place where He is calling me to do the impossible...to go completely out of my comfort zone and do something I KNOW that I cannot do on my own. This blog will document my journey into the unknown. Let's see what God has in store for me...

  In the summer of 2009 I went to a new summer camp with my church. I was a bit apprehensive about this new camp. Up until that point I had always attended Liberty University's summer camp, which of course isn't exactly "camp". We stayed in nice dorm rooms with plenty of toilets and showers. The speakers were good, and I always came back from that week on a spiritual high that quickly faded. Now my church was trying out something new. We were going to a REAL camp...with CABINS! One bathroom for 8 girls. At least it had air conditioning...
So camp started, and you know what? God got my attention that week. This wasn't just a "spiritual high" that I would soon fall away from, back to where I was before. For the first time that I could remember, I think I felt God hug me that week. I was on fire for Him! My love for Him grew immensely, and after the week was over and I was back home, I wrote out a promise to my Lord. "Lord, I want to do what You want me to do. I will go where You lead, and I will not hesitate. Just lead me." A few weeks later, God laid it on my heart that He wanted me to attend Word of Life Bible Institute in Florida. And, of course, I was a bit apprehensive...
Word of Life Florida is a one-year school where all you study is the Bible. I thought it was a
great place. What an awesome way to spend a whole year! So you know what I said to God?

No.

No way. Absolutely not. I will go ANYWHERE but there. It is too far away and it will not benefit me in my future goals. I wasn't going into the ministry, so why would I need to go to a Bible school? I fought God in this way for several months, telling everyone that I felt "led" to attend Liberty University. Then, in December of 2009 I finally gave in. It's funny how God is always in control.

  By the time I graduated in 2010 I was all set up to attend Word of Life. The day we left I felt devastated. This was completely going to mess up the life that I had planned for myself. But I knew God was coming with me and that this was what He wanted. So off we went to sunny Florida, and you know what? God got my attention AGAIN! I grew in the Lord more in that one year than I had in my entire life. I learned so much about the Bible I had never known before, and read Scriptures that I didn't even know existed! God stretched me and strengthened me through the hard times and the easy times, and all I wanted to do was to keep on growing like this. So I decided that attending a second year at Word of Life in New York would be the perfect place to do just that. I set it up to go there, and I was so excited. Then, in the summer of 2011 during summer camp at Word of Life, God spoke again. I could feel Him leading me on another adventure. During the school year we had a Biblical Counseling class taught by Pastor Steve Viars. Pastor Viars has a church in Lafayette, Indiana called Faith Church. He is very focused on reaching out the community and getting people in the church doors. Faith is on a campus with a community center, Biblical counseling center, skate park, and Vision of Hope which is a Residential Treatment Center for women who are struggling with drug and alcohol abuse, self-harm, eating disorders, and unplanned pregnancies. He had mentioned Vision of Hope one day in class and that there are internships available there. I hadn't given it much thought at the time, but now I knew this was God's next step for me. I looked up some information about Vision of Hope on their website, and sent an email to the Intern Coordinator for more information concerning the internship. When God leads you, He is not subtle and there is no question about it...I knew what God wanted me to do, and this time I didn't hesitate. The decision was hard, and VERY scary, but it was made. After graduating from Word of Life in August of 2011 I went through the interviewing process with Vision of Hope and got the opportunity to visit and job shadow the interns for a weekend in March. Shortly after my visit, I was officially accepted as an intern.

The internship training will start on July 2nd and will end in July of 2013. All of the new interns, including myself, will go through one week of training followed by one week of job shadowing before beginning the internship. During the first 6 months the interns are responsible for supervising the residents who are in "Phase One" of the program three days a week. Nighttime security responsibilities are on a rotating schedule. During the second 6 months the interns have additional duties including staying in the "Trauma Suite" two nights a week. This is where the women stay who have been through traumatic experiences and may need assistance at night.

  What is required for this internship is completely out of my comfort zone, and I KNOW that there is no way that I can do this on my own, but you know what? I think that's where God wants all of us...completely reliant on Him for everything. Only then will we be surrendered to His will and always ready to bring Him praise and glory. I'm not there yet, but God is bringing me to that place. I believe that this will possibly be the most challenging year of my life, and I truly treasure your prayers. There is no way that I can do this without the prayers of my loved ones, and I am truly thankful for my friends and family who have been so supportive through the whole decision-making process. My parents are my biggest supporters, and I am SO thankful for them!

  By nature I tend to be apprehensive when called out of my comfort zone, but I guess I should know better than that by now. God is so sovereign and good, and only He knows what is best for us. I'm so glad I can trust Him.

  So, I guess we'll see what adventure God has set before me! Whoever said that the Christian life is boring has never gone on a real adventure with God. He is so exciting! Please keep me and my family in your prayers as we travel next weekend, and please pray for me, that I won't let myself get in the way of what God wants to do, and that I will seek His wisdom, not my own, in whatever situations I may face there. You can read all about Faith Ministries and Vision of Hope at their web site, http://www.faithlafayette.org/voh

Well, ready or not...
Here we go.


"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us,  to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen."
-Ephesians 3:20-21